I Never Showed This Video... How It Feels When Your Mom Passes

I have tied many ties in my life. But nothing could prepare me this time. Most people don't want to know how it feels to experience your mom passing away. I get it. I've never been the type to upload content that everyone wanted anyway. Otherwise I'd probably be way bigger than I am now. This is just me. I'd be a liar if I uploaded a video and was always happy.

I think apart of my content is surrealism. Which is bad for branding, it's unpredicting, it's bad marketing, and it doesn't benefit me one bit. Why do I still do it? Because I don't need anyone to tell me how to run my channel. Sure, I could blow up if I followed a program. But then I'll never be able to say I'm self-made. Nobody knows what I do outside of YouTube. I live a whole different life to support my channel, pay my bills, and eat comfortably. You can say, "I did it the harder way." Or I do it the risky way. Cause now I'm prime for depression and humiliation because I don't follow society's norms.

What do I gain in not being me? If I don't grow, it just means no one likes me enough. It means I don't have what it takes to grow an audience. It means I'm different. And as much as that hurts, it would hurt me more to not be true to myself. Even in this video, I shouldn't be vlogging. I'm getting ready for my mom's funeral, why would I want to remember that? Or better, why wouldn't I want to remember?

Or Why wouldn't I want to look back and see how much I've changed. It's pointless to look back at so many videos where I was playing the YouTube game being fake happy. I'm not happy. I haven't been happy in so long I forgot what it feels like to smile. Let alone feel the peace that comes from being glad that I'm doing what I do. Not because I'm wishing for dumb luck or to discover an audience that's similar to me.

Before my mom passed away, we spent hours watching @Wil Dasovich Travel Vlogs. You have no idea how much they made my mom forget that she was expiring. So here's the truth if you really want to know. I said this before but I understand it's hard to look at old videos. Before my mom passed away, she asked me, what would I want to do if she were not dying?

I answered, I'd probably start a travel vlog and live my life because I know how short life is. She didn't tell me that she'd put aside some money for me to travel vlog. It was her dying wish. "For taking care of me, as I have taken care of you when you were young, One of my final wishes if for you to travel the world and bring happiness to other people that are suffering. But do it in the way that expresses who you truly are.

Live your own life. Tell your story, and tell your truth." - Mom wrote a check for $15,000, saying promise you will use his money to buy the things you need to become the blogger you need to be. Don't spend a dollar on drugs, I'll always be your first subscriber and first viewer. Take good care son. Be strong for me. Ily"

#lateupload #mama #1000subscribers

My blog has more content to dive into and it is the best way to support my career as a creator.
Visit: https://www.blog.abstractdiscovery.com

My Premium, uncensored, no-limits content is found on Substack
Visit: https://josephmayuyo.substack.com

Purchase products that you can put your logo on. I only sell to sellers.
Visit: https://abstractdiscovery.com/shop

For more services, booking, and business inquiries
Visit: https://abstractdiscovery.com

If you're reading this and you're not subscribed, that's extremely sus. I suggest you consider subscribing today and reap the benefits of seeing the early days of this start-up media company. Learn from our mistakes, learn from our accomplishments. If we can do it, why can't you?

Watch my most viewed video (it's crap but for SEO sake):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_um9XvssbrU&t=30s

Wondering how to watch onlyfans privately? No bank statements? I got you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBIlDVaiyJg

This is where to watch where I started YouTube all over after being off the platform for 10 years due to me joining a street gang and spiraling out to becoming a cult leader. That's season 3.
Watch Season 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3mk04O1alA&list=PL5-z4gmoYUPrmBYVwOm3h-GbBQCMveqCM

Watch Season 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31fXJsSlCvk&list=PL5-z4gmoYUPoC8PjdXjaUYlJVZ1nNipNO

Season X: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw9BOWXo3p0&list=PL5-z4gmoYUPqTrBt8V9B5rOye7MM04MDg

Season 4: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-9LzFzh9Oo&list=PL5-z4gmoYUPojeG7R7iTGRykjMBYglUCd

Season 5:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sM2JbnLn6Ck&list=PL5-z4gmoYUPolgXh9QU2Rdf4jhQUGXAbh

#XR

Hit me up on Twitter for the fastest response @abstractdiscov
...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBvUzjeVNIk