Majin: Alright, what do we have on the agenda?
Unused: Somebody just caught a time-travelling panda!
Majin: Gosh darn, bruh, is that the only thing that we have?
Unused: Well, a Reddit user quit because he found his dad!
A pterodactyl flew in and blew up the Eiffel Tower,
A grilled cheese gained sentience and is rising up to power!
Majin: Some guy managed to turn light into a consumable powder,
he used it to make a very special kind of clam chowder!
Unused: A rabbit tried to land on planet mars but she failed
An alligator became best friends with a snail
A cow with a beard found the friccin' holy grail
And some species of rock are able to eat kale
Majin: Someone was caught stealing hair gel
He confessed to the crime so they sent his ass to jail
Someone found a fruit that was a little too pale
And one more thing...
Unused: Another train derailed~!
...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jA3rcWEkTJ8