Dusting Off: Star Wars Rogue Squadron (Nintendo64) Battle Above Taloraan and Blockade on Chandrila
Episode 5 of a casual playthrough of this excellent n64 game from yesteryear. An elegeant title from a more civilized age...
A smug Imperial Moff is about to have a little accident with his Tibanna gas stores as we take to the clouds on Not-Bespin. In return, we must stop his attempts at revenge on the tranquil planet of Chandrila. Stabilize your rear deflectors and watch for enemy fighters in our next episode of Dusting Off: Star Wars Rogue Squadron!
Earthbound's designers hate you. They hate me. They hate us. Don't believe me? Join me for another episode of Dusting Off Earthbound (SNS) blind and watch me waste an hour of my life walking back and forth from a stupid cave to the stupid general store to the stupid city of Fourside managing a stupidly diminished inventory that is already smaller than it should be. Kudos to you, programmers, you clearly wanted to make people angry, and you succeeded.
Jazz it up in Fourside as our trio of heroes finally figure out how concert tickets work and enjoy the world-famous and debt-ridden Runaway Five. Amidst encore performances and tales of financial servitude, Ness and company return to the desert in their search for wealth. The labyrinthine passages beneath the shifting sands await in Dusting Off Earthbound (SNES) blind!
I should make a video game where it turns off your monitor at random intervals. There's no interesting level design, no engaging areas that force you to put your skills to task. I just shut down your TV. I'll call it "challenging," since it's hard to play a game with the TV off, right? If that sounds fucking stupid, yes, yes it is. Enter Dusting Off! Donkey Kong Country (SNES)!
At the top of the crucible, at the twilight of our struggles, when all hope has faded, it is none other than Harry, resident horndog and perpetual Tutorial Giver, who shines a light on our other friend Marcia, and provides the guidance necessary to overcome her past trauma and live for today! Break down your barriers and RoboBattle with your true friends in Dusting Off Custom Robo (GameCube)!
The campaign against the BeanBean Kingdom begins as we engage the first of the enemy defenses in the skies. Unfortunately, the Koopa Cruiser ain't exactly the Highwind and we're soon earthbound again as we continue press on. Fanbois, jump rope, and the heroes of another story are all in order for Dusting Off Mario&Luigi SuperStarSaga (GameBoy Advance)!
With that bitch Venus dead at our hands, Qrow and party continue on in the quest for more Magi, this time ending up in a strange race circuit hosted by a familiar face from the past. Once the dragon jockey escapades are behind us, we'll find ourselves in the token Asian world and investigating a shocking banana smuggling conspiracy in Dusting Off Final Fantasy Legend 2 (GameBoy)!
Our friends are off to a warmer climate as Ness, Paula, and Jeff hit the warm sands of Summers in their mission to save the world. This tourist trap is home to insane prices, grounded boats, rumors of questionable club scenes, murderous taxis, homicidal dude-bros, GAME REGISTRATION EVENTS, dubious museum exhibits...and probably more than I just described in Dusting Off Earthbound (SNES) blind!
With our new troops ready for battle, our hero puts them to the test against pirates in the frigid waters of Lutra before continuing on towards the garrison at Formido. It's an uphill battle at Vespa hill as we endure arrows and endless whining in Dusting Off Tactics Ogre: The knight of Lodis (GBA)!
Our trek westward continues as Qrow's party finally starts to abandon their pajamas for proper classes and distinction in the swamps of Bison. The dragons make their first appearance as they glare menacingly at the team and charge slower than a stunned Goomba in one of the most ignominious debuts a fantasy titan has ever known in Dusting Off Tactics Ogre: The Knight of Lodis (GameBoy Advance)!