I was rummaging around today and found a CD of mine, from 1997, marked "Crystal Heart - Pre-Mix". I put it in to play - there's another video of this - and it turned out it wasn't, what it was in fact was a CD of the original mono demos of provisional tracks for that album. And among them was 'She's Cried A Million Tears', recorded in a nigh-empty hall in Somerset, at an afternoon soundcheck for the evening's show. Talk about ghosts. I hadn't heard it in 26 years, since I took the tape to a studio with the other demos and had them pressed up as a CD to work out arrangements, keys, running order etc. I couldn't help but sing a 'now' version. It was .... difficult. This is actually Take 2. Take 1, as you can hear me allude to at the start about "jinxed", was afflicted by a wave of problems, some technical, some emotional. I may upload it, for reasons that will become obvious if I do. I was always proud of this song. I'm proud of all my songs, like any parent, but this one... hmm. Every songwriter will tell you, at some point, "I didn't write this song, it was given to me." Well, ALL of my songs are like that, but this one came to me as a present, as a gift. It's one of the few I remember writing, because I don't remember writing it. One minute there was an empty page in my writing pad, then there was two full pages with this, in my handwriting. How long it took me to write it down, as opposed to write it, I don't know. Might have been 15 minutes, might have been 15 lifetimes. Oddly, I always thought this song dated from 1987, but digging the lyrics out today, I note they are copyrighted 1989. Those are the typed lyrics from putting my words into electronic files circa 1994 so maybe it's a typo. I did play this live occasionally, more so when I wrote it than later. It was like throwing a bucket of ice over the audience. No one had a song about domestic abuse back then, no one. There's not one like it since this, either. The great Julie Covington did Alice Cooper's 'Only Women Bleed' back in 1978, in her majestic voice, a performance that I loved. I was in the army then, and those lyrics were given 'boy-sneers', you can work out why. That doesn't go anywhere near the dark corridors this song does though. "The first blow sent her reeling... violence rained down on her..." - you sing that to a Friday night crowd out for a good time, you pretty soon hear silence descending, even crowds that knew me and my social commentary work, even the folk club crowds. I cared not a damn. I still had the CD in the player, cued to the demo, so after Paul Murphy 2023 finishes, Paul Murphy 1997 comes in. A few alternate lyrics in one verse, that I knew nothing about. It starts at 09:59 if you wish to skip the 'now' version. It is worth mentioning, that when this song came down, 34 [or 36] years ago, domestic abuse was thought to be a one-way ride. We now know that not to be the case, with almost as many male domestic abuse sufferers in the UK in 2022 as women. It seems we have become good at statistic-ising the matter, not so at stigmatising and stopping it. Love and peace, Paul M 28 August 2023 'She's Cried A Million Tears' - words and music © Paul Murphy / 1987, renewed 2023 - - - - On a tertiary note, whilst here, if I may be so bold - I am uploading videos of my songs, my performances, my prose recitals, etc, to raise funds for my most amazing children, who get any donations when they reach 16. I have Progressive Palsy F-MND, and - well, and. There is no cure. If you have enjoyed this video, and would care to make a small donation for them, many sincere thanks and much gratitude, from both myself, and from them via myself; the link is https://PayPal.Me/DylEmTrustFund If you have listened and read this far, you have been extraordinarily kind with your precious time, and my sincere thanks for that. Paul M x - - - - Other arenas: https://www.ebay.co.uk/usr/audburn My Patreon is now back up [25.07.23], and it contains 'Vault' material that does not appear anywhere else. https://www.patreon.com/user?u=86744526 Addendum : I have started an Odysee channel, where I had hoped to place some of my more - well, not controversial, at least not for the sake of it, but more 'pointed' material. Due to the rapid progress of my Motor-FND, it may or may not happen, but here is the link if you want to pop in there occasionally to see - https://odysee.com/@PaulMurphy4Em+Dyl:9 https://PayPal.Me/DylEmTrustFund - - - - - 'Imagine there is a Heaven - and it is holding your children in your arms.' - Me, 27.07.2023 ... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjpvWc-_fJI

Loose session. 'Of' , 'Manhattan' - words and music by Paul Murphy © 1989, 1993, 2023 'Where Does The Sun Go To At Night?' - words by Emily Murphy / music by Paul Murphy © 2023 Light and peace, Me December 2023 - - - x - - - x - - - x - - - x - - - - - - - - - - - - x On a tertiary note, whilst here, if I may be so bold - I am uploading videos of my songs, my performances, my prose recitals, etc, to raise funds for my most amazing children, who get any donations when they reach 16. I have Progressive Palsy F-MND, and - well, and. There is no cure. If you have enjoyed this video, and would care to make a small donation for them, many sincere thanks and much gratitude, from both myself, and from them via myself; the link is https://paypal.me/DylEmTrust If you have listened and read this far, you have been extraordinarily kind with your precious time, and my sincere thanks for that. Waste not a second - I beg you. Paul M x - - - - Other arenas: https://www.ebay.co.uk/usr/audburn My Patreon contains 'Vault' material that does not appear anywhere else : https://www.patreon.com/user?u=86744526 https://odysee.com/@PaulMurphy4Em+Dyl:9 Rumble: SomePaulMurphyForYou https://paypal.me/DylEmTrust - - - - - - 'Imagine there is a Heaven - and it is holding your children in your arms.' - me, 2023 ... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccJcOjF4SDI