Reading by A.I. Brian Fritz, courtesy of Project HighJump and Mr. Townsend
Link to reddit post: https://archive.ph/1zBpc
Text:
My dad came out as trans before I was even in kindergarten, which destroyed my parents' marriage and ruined my life
I just need to vent somewhere for the sake of my sanity. All of this is true and real. I wish it weren't. I feel the way I feel about it, and I make no apologies. I'm going to piss off a lot of people, and I don't care. I'm the troubled son of a transexual. I'm literally the living breathing collateral damage of a marriage destroyed by transexualism. My dad started doing this kind of gender-bending shit to himself before I was even in kindergarten. It devastated my mom when she found out. It broke her and shattered her entire worldview, and hopes for the future. She was very upset that he didn't tell her about his gender dysphoria before getting married to her and having me. She felt deceived. Betrayed. Alone. She fell into depression after the divorce and became increasingly verbally/psychologically abusive towards me, which made me become hateful towards her for many years. I basically became my mom's personal punching bag. She secretly resented me. She called me degrading names daily, and screamed in my face once that I was a mistake. She regretted giving birth to "such a stupid idiot person" on several occasions. She then went on to isolate both herself and me from the entire family on both sides, and kept me all to herself while she mostly just sat in front of her computer all day on chatrooms. She wouldn't talk to anyone outside or open the door. She tried to keep my dad's transexualism a secret. I didn't know anything about it for years. I was overly sheltered and protected, but also psychologically abused. I'm a fucked up 30 year-old man with anger issues today, living, ironically, in my transexual dad's kitchen due to hard economic conditions in California. My mother just died of cancer 4 years ago. I'm severely depressed. I have no personal space or privacy, and I'm going absolutely insane. I could write a whole series of books about my life story. I still love my dad, and we've done a lot of catching up, but I secretly hate that he did this to himself. I've started to resent transexuals now. I've started recently becoming very outspoken online (in secret) against it all, and even telling various transexuals to just fucking be men, and quit hiding behind stupid masks of make-up. I call them delusional confused men in dresses. I've trashed on Jazz Jennings multiple times with no shame. Transexualism both saddens and triggers me. I can't help it. I've tried to understand. I really have. Go ahead, tell me that I'm wrong for being angry. Call me "ignorant". Write me hateful replies for being a "bigot". I don't care. I need to vent. I've bottled this shit up for too long. I've been too quiet. I can't help it. I feel the way that I feel. Fucking shoot me. I just want my dad back. I barely got to know my dad as a man up until kindergarten age. Dads are supposed to be men. But that's never going to happen. I'm never going to know what it's like to grow up as a boy with his strong male father role model by his side. Wishing for a different life at this point is as unrealistic as trying to biologically switch genders. I can't imagine how my mom felt. She married a man and thought she had a man for life. I'm normally a very "live-and-let-live" type of guy, but transexualism is literally destroying straight families. Why was I born into this nonsense? I didn't ask for any of this. I'm so traumatized by the world and all of this bullshit. What the fuck happened? What's wrong with humanity? This feels like an alternate dimension or something. This is some Twilight Zone shit. This isn't the world that I was born into back in 1988. This place freaks me out. I want to go home.
-Troubled son of a transexual father
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXDAVYlvsvs